JOURNEY TO ONENESS
written as Thea Alexander in The Invisible Thread
Let your mind wander as you relax into the floor beneath you. The here and now fading into the far reaches of consciousness, as you drift backward in time. Sensations of the physical body diminish the further back you go, disappearing completely as your energy merges with the universe. Focus now, on the lifetimes passing by in your mind’s eye, each like a silent film. Every muted memory is poignantly alive within you. Knowingness comes fully on-line as your soul recognizes and connects with each moment that has woven the tapestry of your very existence.
A past-life regression was lead as part of a weekend workshop I attended many years ago. Aimed at teaching introductory principles and practice techniques for psychic development, people from all walks of life gathered to share their skills and abilities. Each with special and unique gifts, and each with different levels of awareness and understanding of the true self. It was a good group from which and with whom to learn.
Course outlines were distributed, along with other materials, at the onset of the initial session. I was thrilled and apprehensive at the same time to learn past-life regression was a part of this offering. I had read the works of prominent authors in this field (Brian Weiss, M.D., Dolores Cannon, and Dr. Michael Newton) and had been fascinated with such a concept for several years. As one who has a history of experiencing technical difficulties with any visualization exercise, my anxiety began to rise. Knowing the best way to decrease anxiety is for me to become familiar with the challenge, I used time between activities and away from class to familiarize myself with concepts related to past-life regression specific to being an actual participant. In doing so, grew increasingly skeptical of my ability to have a genuine experience.
The last day of the workshop had arrived and the time was now upon me. Along with everyone else, I chose a place on the floor, made myself comfortable, and excitedly hoped for the best. Instructions were provided, exceedingly detailed and specific. We were requested to review the overarching theme of this incarnation, and during the regression, go back to a time in a past-life when we felt as we primarily had, thus far, in this incarnation.
Upon hearing the directions, I became acutely aware of the impression that I don’t belong here. Not here in this room or in this place in time. In fact this felt immensely right, as if I was on the verge of some great discovery. As for my incarnation, the impression I received at a soul level was that I was not from here, at least not originally. A brief review of my life thus far concurred, I have always felt as thought I do not belong on Earth and certainly not in a body, it never seemed to fit well.
As the facilitator continued to answer questions and provide reassurance to other participants, I fondly remembered all of the astronomy books I used to borrow from the local library as a young child. Often times, keeping them long after the due date despite incurring fines my father had to pay. I willingly accepted lectures about responsibility and the value of a dollar inorder to read them one more time. It was a fair trade for a few more days with my precious books. They were my direct link of escape into the stars.
The faint sound of a bell ended my daydream and my awareness shifted focus to the now. The regression was beginning. After a brief grounding and centering exercise, we began to relax into the floor as sounds around us faded into another dimension. At first, and for what seemed like forever, I could not let go to the level required. It’s no surprise my ego-self’s innate desire to maintain control managed to creep into even this setting. It wasn’t until I began falling asleep that the regression truly began.
Somewhere in the level of consciousness that occurs between awake and asleep, I found myself experiencing vivid impressions playing out like two old film reels running parallel in the space on either side of me. I was not a physical body, rather an impression of myself, now in this newly created space. The backdrop, a vast starfield that appeared endless. I felt as thought I was, for all intents and purposes, walking amongst millions and millions of stars. Yet, there was nothing to support me, no path or trail to follow, nothing but stars. Seemingly limitless in all directions, stars everywhere – above, below, and all around. I suddenly felt chilled and did not want to reach for my blanket for fear the experience would end.
Infinite darkness impressed upon me I was no longer on Earth, and my soul had journeyed far beyond my physical self. I became aware the films on either side of me had specific frames, and within these frames were scenes which played out within each of them. I glimpsed bits and pieces as they moved by at a moderate pace. Attempts to focus on one particular frame or slow them from passing were futile. I did not feel as though what I was looking for was within this experience. There was a sense of urgency to journey beyond this point.
The facilitator’s voice was faint in the background and sounded far, far away. Frames continued moving by, or rather, the awareness now became that I was moving past them. It appeared as though my thoughts controlled the speed at which things progressed. With this awareness, the films disappeared completely and I found myself drifting toward a large luminescent tube. Glimmering silvery white, mutable density, and in constant motion within itself. My excitement grew, when I would have expected hesitancy. I felt as if I was about to de-board an airplane to find my Tribe waiting for me with anxious joy!
Finding myself before the tube, I positioned directly in front of the opening and marveled at how large it was. At many times my human height, it appeared enormous, yet despite this not looming. I reached out to touch the glimmering substance, and noted it was cooler than the surrounding atmosphere. It imparted energy that was light and dense at the same time, unlike anything I had ever felt. I began repositioning slowly into the tube, aware of the energy change within me, as if every molecule of my being was lighter than air. My vibration increased substantially and now matched that of my surrounding cocoon of light. Advancing now through the tube, slowly at first and then at great speed, I appeared to be floating as it moved by me yet it was I who was accelerating at great speed. The tube had numerous twists and turns, peaks and valleys, as it carried me far away from my Earthly existence. As I traveled, I was able to see through the veil of light and was impressed with the vastness of the star fields and the universes laid out before me.
As quickly as it began, my transition ended. The tube ceased to exist, as if it was never even there. I peered into the darkness to detail my surroundings. Met with a vast and seemingly familiar cold darkness, believed myself back where I began. Admittedly, this was an immense let down. I had feelings associated with a long awaited homecoming, and found nothing in its place.
Pondering, briefly, how incredible the whole experience was I became aware of an immeasurable shimmering silvery-blue light in the distance, as if I was viewing a metropolitan area glowing on the horizon. I became excited, gleeful, and almost giddy at the sight. As it moved steadily closer, the light grew in intensity. I became almost overwhelmed with excitement for no apparent reason. After a moment, I was enveloped in an indescribable light energy. Before me were hundreds, if not thousands, of silvery-blue iridescent energies appearing to mimic a loose human form without distinct features of any kind, there were no fingers or toes, no genitals, no facial features. Approximately four feet in height, they had the most glorious energy; and an incredible means of communication, telepathy and thought forms.
Suddenly able to communicate telepathically, I received an impression of many joyful greetings and an overwhelming sense of belonging, akin to coming home and being missed as if absent for lifetimes. Of The Collective gathered here, one entity came forward to communicate; and I immediately got the impression of my father’s energy. Thought forms exchanged between us at lightening speed. Lifetimes of information relayed in seconds of communication. Impressed upon me were significant events from this incarnation and better yet, specific individuals who were now in spirit, all of who had come to greet me. Some stood out more than others, yet all were sending a positive and radiating energy to me.
Instructions from the facilitator played into my awareness, “As you travel backward in time, review the lifetimes you have had. Seek a past life to explore where you experienced the feelings you have had in this one.” Rather than a focus on any negative connotation, the intent was to connect and gain awareness of what was brought forward into this lifetime from one passed.
Again, thought form exchanges of communication ensued between the representative entity before me, as it moved ever closer. Now immediately before me, I recognized there was a familiarity with this entity, a knowingness and closeness that spanned more than this moment, more than one human lifetime. Our togetherness was infinite. I was bursting with a sense of love and belonging I never experienced in the physical. I felt humbled the energy chosen to greet me was one I have been with for eternity. I noted sensations of belonging, a sense of safeness that was almost palpable, and an love of unconditional measure all surrounding me in this moment.
We communicated back and forth for a short while; and, others with whom I had incarnated during this Earth life now in spirit, also chimed in. Of course, doing so in a manner I would recognize, generally with the impression of their once human voice or a familiar image. Numerous energies came forward in this manner, one after another, presenting with an immeasurable loving presence. I was fascinated by all of them.
Every communication was facilitated through an effortless positive exchange of energy. As the exchanges took place I became aware that the energies all knew of my purpose for regression, and they had all volunteered to greet me and aid in my soul’s experience. The task being twofold, to ease my transition into this space with a familiar and loving being, and to serve as once voice for them to ease communication, although this was absolutely unnecessary. In spirit we are all one, thus our communication is such that all know, through this universal oneness. It appeared the most familiar energy was the universal communicator of this group, at least in their exchanges with me. It was more for my benefit than anything else.
The agreed upon regression objective was to experience the predominant underlying theme, central to emotional existence, in my human form during this incarnation. Completely trusting of our universal oneness, the lesson began. First the main entity, I believed to be that of my father, came forward and blended its energy with mine. I have no words to describe this experience. The intensity pales by the sheer lack of vividness of word our language affords. I will, however, endeavor to be as descriptive as possible.
As the energy surrounded me, I perceived warmth with fullness which created an unwavering sensation of calm that completely permeated me. The lightness of the energy was surprising given the immense density with which it enveloped me, feeling like an invisible blanket of sorts. There was a knowingness of our universal oneness, so expansive it is beyond comprehension. The oneness instilled awareness of universal consciousness, all being of one, connected and thus all knowing. Looking back, I would have thought this to create fear. However, I learned it is without fear and only through love the understanding of all is created. No judgment or seeking to understand, for that is a human condition. Only knowingness and acceptance of what is, as it is, and the awareness of it. Much like our psychological perspectives on radical acceptance, only much deeper in concept and reality, as it is in spirit.
The other energies now joined, one-by-one, until those most familiar to me and I had merged. Completely encircled by them, we exchanged energies, raising the vibration even higher. The remaining hundreds then surrounded us. I was literally buzzing with energy and radiating love. In unison, we raised the level of our energies. The sensation of completeness, the breadth and depth of love I experienced filled me through and through. I felt as if I would literally burst, yet there was room for limitless expansion. My being had no limitations. The love energy moved through me, within me, and around me. I radiated love and took it in from the energies around me. I was one with the universe, an infinite and expansive being of love. This was the sensation I yearned for and had been in search of my entire life. At last, I was home. I had achieved oneness with my soul family…my tribe.
A few moments passed in this blissful state, and I had already determined I never wanted to return to the human-self. It became apparent to me now why souls do not possess full awareness of our origin when we incarnate – this was too good, too incredible to be without. Unattainable in human form, the sensations of warmth, fullness, calmness, and undulating waves of love would be too much for the human condition to experience. The energy would surely short-circuit the physical body’s energetic systems. In spirit form, however, this was the norm. I realized transitioning to spirit was nothing short of miraculous. The sensation of love in spirit exists at a level unfathomable in the human experience. The intensity was broken when the main communicator reminded me of our purpose, and we again exchanged thought forms agreeing we must now create the human experience. For contrast and comparison, as was the intent of this regression and but one of my soul’s many lessons.
In unison, the level of energy was gradually decreased and the entities moved away. Remaining in a circle around me, to provide a sense of safety and support, the energies continued to move further and further away. I was continually reassured and supported, everything would be okay. This was merely a representation of my Earth bound experience. They sensed my apprehension, fear, and ensuing sadness. Several of the entities, closest to me during this incarnation, remained near yet now separated their energy from mine. Being in their presence and unable to connect with their energy created an enormous chasm within me. The physical proximity was one thing, but the inability to mingle energy left me feeling desperately cold, alone, without purpose, and completely disconnected. This was an alone unlike anything I had ever experienced, and intensity much greater than anything I endured in human form. And yet, it was all too familiar.
I began to sob in spirit and my physical form. It welled from deep within and overtook me. Sobs from a place so primal, I feared what may come next. My body wracked with an intense emotional pain so great I wept uncontrollably. With every ounce of my being, I sobbed. For all I never achieved, for all I had lost, and for those who had transitioned to spirit before me. I wept too, longing to remain with them. From the depths of my soul I experienced the loss of my tribe and the longing I had to reconnect. Worse than any loss of my human existence, the intensity of this moment far surpassed anything I could have ever imagined.
After what seemed like an eternity, the level of energy returned. The sensations of warmth, fullness, calmness, and love enveloped me once more with the familiar and welcomed density only their energy could create. The main entity came forward, comforting and consoling me. I received reassurance from many of the souls present we completed our objective and I did well with the process. Nothing but love radiated around and through me.
As I became aware of the facilitator counting backwards, parting thought forms were exchanged. I felt a sadness stirring in me as I moved back into a space of awareness, now knowing there is so much more. The entire regression spanned approximately 50 minutes, yet felt like lifetimes and a split second all at once. How could it have been possible to experience so much in such a short amount of time? To where did I journey, project, or astral travel? When and where was the origin of my soul?
While the unknown outweighs the known on an average day, this experience was life-changing. Although many questions were answered, many remained. I gained a better understanding of my soul, who I am underneath the ‘meat wagon’, and my purpose here. I now trust, implicitly, the creative energy of the universe will reveal the answers as I am able to comprehend and make the best use of the conscious awareness of its existence.
Once fearful of death, and of leaving behind those in the human condition whom I love dearly on this plane, I now view the transition from human form to spirit in a different way. While I know a part of my my physical-self will experience intense emotions for those who will remain after my passing, I also know the time between my transition and theirs is almost instantaneous in a universal sense. Time, as we experience it in human form, does not exist in the spirit world. It is purely a human concept. When those with whom I have learned and loved in this incarnation pass into spirit, we will be together again to plan our next grand adventures.
My first past life regression was an amazing experience. One I could not have predicted and one I will never forget. Every recollection, in thought or verbally, affords me the opportunity to relive every sensation with explicit detail. The regression established, within me, a deep understanding of my connectedness with the universal oneness within us all. Re-establishing my awareness of the Invisible Thread connecting my soul with Source, doing so in a way such that my conscious humanness can now grasp it fully.
In the days, weeks, and months that passed following the regression, I felt undeniably different. The same, yet subtly changed. I felt more dense yet not in actual weight. Energetically, I was more alive than I ever remembered feeling. Left with a deeper sense of what I am and forever changed, I was unable or unwilling to view my current existence and the concept of ‘life’ the same way. My understanding of the human condition, of soul, of what it truly meant to live, expanded exponentially as if I was viewing my life and the self for the first time, only this time from the perspective of soul. My thirst to learn more was and continues to be unquenchable.
I continue to channel messages from The Collective, the entities I merged with during the regression. I trust the guidance I receive and share it with others, as I am directed. Their messages are not solely mine, but for us all as we share a oneness with the universe.
This chapter is dedicated to the pioneer light-workers who have shone the way through their commitment to others becoming aware of who they truly are; and to my soul family, for teaching me how to be human. With sincerest gratitude, I acknowledge my mentor and soul sister, Sunny Dawn Johnston, for being my light. Humbled by your dedication to inspire, encourage, and support, I feel blessed to be in your tribe.